6 Things You Should Never Talk About On A First Date

First dates can be tricky for anyone, after the initial online connection (because let’s be honest, who meets in real life anymore?) Actually getting together can be nerve-wracking for even the most hardened of online daters.

Got past the initial awkward introductions, find you have chemistry and want to put your money on a second date?

6 things you should categorically avoid discussing if you don’t want to scare you date away …

Babies 

Ah the old favourite. kids, babies, infants, nephews and nieces – basically any living being under four foot tall.

*Never* under any circumstances, bring up the subject of babies – not even in ‘my friend had a baby on the weekend’ kind of way.

Men won’t think, ah that’s nice, her friend had a baby on the weekend – men will think OMFG, get me out of here, this women wants a baby and she wants one now.

Relationships

It’s a tricky one and a trap I have often seen women fall into – men asking the question and women ‘harmlessly’ replying.

What are you looking for?

Should you be asked this question, be on guard, it is a trick. Your date is making polite conversation. He doesn’t really want to know what you are looking for and he definitely doesn’t want to know that you are looking for a long-term relationship or, *shudders*… marriage.

Marriage 

Reign it in, would you.

This is a first date, not an interview for a possible life-long spouse. Talking about marriage doesn’t make you look open to possibilities it makes you look like a psycho, happy to take the first offer that comes her way.

What a ball-breaker you are at work 

I know, I know, throw the feminist handbook at me – why shouldn’t a women brag about her career! Yes, sure, spend the evening detailing your rise to the top, not intimidating at all – but if you want your date to feel relaxed and comfortable, I’d suggest you save the mass-sacking episode you volunteered yourself for last week, until you knew each other a bit better.

Deli belly 

Despite having a reputation for lacking in imagination – when it comes to any graphic bodily details from the diarrhoea you had from a dodgy prawn in India to the Botox you had injected under your arms to stop you sweating – men’s imaginations will run wild and haunt them for the entire evening.

 By all means roll out some funny anecdotes, just makes sure they’re not full of s**t. 

Ex-boyfriends

Now, make no mistake, I love banging on about ex’s on a date, but know your limits. By all means mention the fact you have had a boyfriend in your life and this isn’t the first date you have ever been on but just remember that detailing the amazing holiday you once went on together or how great he was in bed is unlikely to get you past the first date.

On a positive note, after all this, if you are struggling to think of something to talk about – talk about them, Nothing intrigues a man more than a conversation about himself.

Boom, who said dating was difficult.

If He Hasn’t Texted Me or Called Me, Is He Thinking About Me?

Last week I read a tweet to the effect of, “If he’s thinking about you, he’s calling or texting you.” Meaning of course, that if our phones are not constantly lighting up, blinking, flashing and ringing that the guy in question is not interested in us at all, so we should probably start to get over it, and read He’s Not Just That Into You for the 20th time. I’m not entirely sure it’s fair to assume that if a guy isn’t texting, that isn’t interested. I’ve met great guys online, and have definitely found myself obsessing over how long he takes to text me back or wondering why he didn’t call when he said he would. I’ve lost sleep over it, and totally stressed myself out. When a guy I like hasn’t texted me back in a week, I started to doubt myself–was something wrong with me?

In the grand scheme of things I understand what this 140 character blurb’s intention was. To empower women and to remind them that they deserve better!  To reinforce that we all deserves someone who wants to talk all.the.time, text all.the.time-but if we’re being honest, we want this without having to really want it, or shudder-come across as “needy.” Our worst fear has become being called a Stage 5 Clinger and we worry that if we want to send a guy  we like an innocent “I hope you have a great day!” text message, that he’ll get spooked and run away.

I sent one of my best friends the above tweet and her response was brilliant. “That’s not true dude. We think about them all the time and aren’t calling them. I’m thinking about HIM right now but I’m not calling/texting/sending him a messenger pigeon. Why does he have to and why does that mean he isn’t thinking about me?”

So How Important Is Texting and Calling In a Relationship?

Every relationship is different, every relationship stage  has it’s own challenges and not all guys are created equal. I’ve dated guys who are texting and calling monsters and at the beginning it’s fun but after a while…what do we need to say…especially when I know I’ll be seeing him later on that day? And then, you start to expect it, right? If he sends you a good morning text most days, but happens to miss a random Wednesday because he was late to work, forgot his coffee or was sick, does it all of a sudden mean you aren’t on his mind? Or more importantly, in his heart? I feel like all these one line quotes-“If he likes you, it only takes 30 seconds to shoot a text” can be ridiculously dangerous. (In the beginning of a dating relationship, I understand this a little more. But as things progress…shouldn’t your relationship?)

In all honesty, I struggle with this. I’m a girl, and especially around certain times of the month, I tend to throw all remnants of rationale out the window and forget.  I forget that life doesn’t always revolve around me, and that the guy I like has tons of other things going on in his world besides checking in with me through-out the day.  I forget that his job is ridiculously stressful, and his boss makes him crazy so the fact that he isn’t texting me  between 8-5 is not a reflection upon how he feels about me. OR if he’s thinking about me.  And you know what? Even if he’s not thinking about me at all times…I’m ok with that.  He works hard. He’s a social butterfly, he’s a loving son, cousin and uncle. He’s a surfer and mountain biker and tries to squeeze as much into the rest of his day as possible.

He’s a great guy and I’m not going to turn into some crazed lunatic drama queen just because he isn’t calling or texting 24/7. Have some confidence. And if he’s not giving you what you need, what your heart needs-phone calls, or otherwise…maybe he’s not the one for you.

Think Beyond The Text Message

He calls me to make plans or when there is something important to talk about. He tries to text me during the work day if it allows. He remembers the important things and when he’s with me, he’s 100% PRESENT. When we’re together, his phone, I’ve noticed, is never in use. He tells me how he feels and most importantly, he shows me.  I know where I stand-I just need to remember that. One thing I do believe is that if a guy wants to be with you, he will.  But can’t he show that in different ways…in his own way? And if I need more non face to face communication, well we are adults here and there is nothing wrong with telling your boyfriend that it would make your day if he texted you once or twice duing the workday. Maybe he just needs a bit of a nudge in the right direction! I’ve spent too much of my dating time worrying about insignificant things like text messages and negating the things that actually count.

Expect The Best

When I unfortunately do get that yucky feeling because it’s 4pm on a Tuesday and I haven’t heard from him yet, maybe I’ll re-read this post.  I’ll remember that I wanted a guy with a full life, who is there when it counts, and I’ll be thankful for him. When it comes to dating, women can sometimes be conditioned to expect the worst of men, and it’s horribly unfair. I’ll expect the best-because it’s all he’s shown me anyway. Maybe on these days, I’ll shoot him a short text-“Hope you’re having a good day!” Without expecting anything back. Perhaps it will make him smile. Relationships are a two way street, after-all. Sometimes I feel like this is so forgotten.

…But Be Smart

With that said, it’s important to be smart and not take this as a license to believe what you want to believe. Actions always speak louder than words, and so if a guy hasn’t texted you in two weeks, it’s time to move on. If he never ever responds to your text messages or phone calls, he’s not interested in you. Tough pill to swallow? Sure. But at least you won’t keep wasting your time on a guy who doesn’t give you any of his.

20 Signs You Should Leave the Person You’re With

Who said relationships were easy?  In a perfect world, we’d all love to have our own flawless fairytale romance where arguments didn’t exist and there were never any ‘misunderstandings’. In reality – being in a relationship can translate to bickering, pet hates, jealousy, the silent treatment and being sent to the dreaded ‘doghouse’.
If your relationship is causing you headaches, remember, it’s perfectly natural to have moments of doubt. Perhaps you’ve had a fight recently, or maybe you’ve started thinking about your ex? If you’ve got cold feet and you’re not sure whether to stay with your other half, here’s a guide to 20 signs that you should leave the person you’re with.

1) Your partner is controlling
Ask yourself this – is your relationship balanced? If your other half is always telling you what to do and you behave like his/her puppet – is this a healthy way of living? No one should be above the other person in a relationship, so get your control back or get out.

2) Your friends don’t approve of your partnerIf in doubt – listen to your friends. They want the best for you, and if they’ve been telling you that your partner isn’t good for you, they’re probably right…

3) It’s turned into more of a friendship than a relationshipHas the spark gone? Be honest with yourself – are you in the relationship because of habit rather than passion? Yes it’s true, passion does fade over time, but if you’ve not been going out that long and you see your partner as more of a pal, perhaps it’s time to call it a day.

4) Your partner doesn’t compliment you or make you feel special anymoreIt doesn’t matter how many years you’ve been together, your partner should always make the effort to make you feel special. If you find that you feel the opposite – then it might be time to move on and find someone who gives you that butterflies feeling that’s been missing for so long.

5) He/she tries to change you An important part of being in a relationship is the willingness to accept each others flaws and differences. If your partner is constantly trying to change you, don’t do it! Be proud of who you are and stay that way!

6) You find yourself tempted by the idea of being single againThis one speaks for itself. When we’re in a happy relationship – being single again has no appeal at all. The pros of being in a relationship massively outweigh the spontaneity of being single, but if you find it’s the complete opposite, then it’s probably time to ‘fess up to your partner that things aren’t right.

7) Your differences are driving you apartEvery couple has differences – and if the relationship is right, you should embrace them. Be supportive of his passion for the local hockey team. Be proud of her love of photography. If your differences are driving you apart, then things will probably continue to escalate…

8) Your future plans aren’t on the same pageUh-oh. If you’re on completely different pages (for example, you definitely want to get married but your partner can’t stand the thought), then that’s a big hint you’re incompatible. If you haven’t already, be sure to speak about the important things in life and find out where you both stand.

9) Arguments are more frequent than the times you get onArguments are a normal part of any relationship, but you’re fighting like cat and dog and the bad times are outweighing the good, then the stress of such a volatile relationship can’t be doing either of you any good.

10) He/she lies to you
Yes, sometimes people tell porkies, but if you’re constantly picking up on lies and feel the trust isn’t in your relationship – why are you with that person?

11) You’re shy about showing your full range of emotionsLife is full of ups and downs and the turbulent emotions that go with them – but if you feel you can’t be yourself around your partner, then you may have built some serious walls in your relationship. Whether we’re elated, or having a tissues-at-the-ready major melt-down, you shouldn’t be afraid to let your partner see you in your most vulnerable state. 

12) Your family aren’t close to your partnerBefore your partner, you had your friends, before your friends, you had your family – you should always listen to your family’s advice as they only want the best for you. If they are critical of your partner, don’t be offended – instead listen before you bicker and ask yourself if there’s any truth in it.

13) You are embarrassed by your partnerThis is a big no-no. If you’re embarrassed by your partner or you’re keeping him/her hidden from friends – ask yourself why you’re with them. You should show nothing but pride for the person you’re with and you should be bragging rather than hiding them from your friends.

14) You keep secrets from each other
A fundamental of any relationship is honesty and openness. If you feel the need to keep secrets, then is this the person you want to spend the rest of your life with?

15) You don’t miss each other when you’re apartEveryone loves to have their own space every now and again, but if it’s got to the stage where you’re relieved when your partner goes away and you don’t miss him/her anymore – the warning bells should ring.

16) You don’t find them attractive anymoreWould you describe your partner as sexy? Ok how about hot? Mildly attractive? If you’re shaking your head to all of these words and your partner is secretly ticking the ‘turn-off’ box, then don’t stay in a relationship just because of convenience.

17) You catch yourself thinking of other people instead of your partnerMaybe there’s someone at work you’ve got a crush on? Or perhaps an old Uni friend? If you’ve started thinking of other people at times your full attention should be on your partner, then this isn’t good for anyone. Watch where your thoughts go, before it leads into the danger zone of infidelity…

18) Your partner spends more time with his/her friends than with youWe all lead busy lives, but if your partner has started spending the majority of his/her time with friends rather than you – it’s time to ask yourselves if there’s a problem with the relationship. Is it really ‘friends’ they’re spending time with? It may be time to find out…

19) Everything your partner does irritates youWe’ve all got pet peeves, but if everything your partner does – from their laugh, to the way they pick their nails or the way they eat irritates you, then you may be subconsciously trying to talk yourself out of the relationship.

20) He/she doesn’t make you a better personRelationships shouldn’t be about co-dependence, they should be about two independent individuals whose union improves each other’s lives. If you can’t think of anything your partner does to make you a better person – from encouraging you at work to sharing life values or supporting your wildest dreams, then it’s time to find someone who does!

Breaking up is never easy, but if you find yourself agreeing with the majority of these points, then the signs are there that it’s time to find someone better suited to you! You only live once…

Why Laughter Is the Best Medicine

Laughter is a bold declaration of happiness.

We’re all familiar with its contagious effect, and attempts to stifle it often result in uncontrollable giggles. Professional comedians claim that there is humor to be found in virtually any situation, given enough time. We all know that laughing feels good, but what impact does it have on our daily wellbeing? Let’s turn to the research to find out.

Recent studies suggest that laughter enhances the quality of romantic relationships. One experiment found that couples instructed to reminisce about occasions where they laughed together reported being more satisfied with their relationships, compared to couples that remembered times when they laughed apart from one another or times when they shared positive (but not funny) experiences1.

Interestingly, the occasions on which couples laughed together were not always positive. This suggests that the ability to laugh about neutral or even negative experiences together enhances relationship satisfaction, which is highly related to feeling happy.

How can you make this work for your relationship? Next time you and your significant other are caught in traffic or dine at a mediocre restaurant, help each other find the humor in the situation.

Each time you do this, you create one more memory for the both of you to fondly remember.

Research also indicates that laughter is powerful enough to enhance our physical health. A recent experiment found that mothers who watched and laughed at a Charlie Chaplin movie, “Modern Times,” had higher levels of melatonin in their breast milk, which helped reduce allergic responses and promoted better sleep in their infant children. Another group of mothers that watched a video about weather information did not experience this change2.

Another experiment revealed that women who watched a humorous movie reported lower stress levels and experienced greater immune system functionality, relative to a control group that watched a tourism video3. Finally, laughing has been associated with decreased levels of prorenin in the blood, which is involved in the onset of diabetic complications4.

Laughter may not be the best medicine, but it does seem to have a legitimate medicinal value.• Stand-up comedy. This art form has entertained the masses for decades. Choose a comedian that’s relatable and not offensive to you. Jerry Seinfeld and Bill Cosby, two all-time greats, have clean acts and are truly funny. Listen to their albums or search for them on YouTube. If you’re lucky, you might even catch them on tour.

• Surround yourself with funny people. Determine whether you habitually spend time with others who tend to talk about grim matters. There’s a time and a place for such discussions, but more often than not, hang out with a friend or family member who keeps things light-hearted and makes you laugh.

• Amuse yourself. Consider this wise adage: “Blessed are we who laugh at ourselves, for we will never cease to be amused.” As we mature, it’s easy to take life far too seriously. Whenever you have a moment alone, get in the habit of laughing out loud. Don’t be shy; nobody can hear you! Think of something amusing you saw or heard earlier in the day or imagine a scene from your favorite comedic movie. Whatever it takes to make you laugh, do it! You’ll be glad you took a break from your usual worries.

9 Qualities a Man Looks for in His Future Wife

Since writing 15 Ways To Love A Woman, I’ve had requests from the gentlemen to write a similar post for the modern, conscious woman who embraces an empowered, traditional femininity. I spent 18 months interviewing 250 men about love + relationships, and I found it interesting that when it comes to love, men want to give it to a woman who has the potential to become their wife.

These are 9 qualities that inspire men to give their heart fully.

1. You are self-developed and whole. You have a well-rounded life that you’ve created for yourself that includes healthy friendships and an outlet for service. You’re most likely a reader, and devour things that interest you. Quite often you initiate and contribute a fresh perspective when conversing with your man. You’ve developed your personal philosophies by thinking through and researching several viewpoints. You are confident about your opinions without being dogmatic.

Men love a woman who is intelligent, articulate, and open minded. You have to do homework to be this kind of woman.

2. You offer him respect and priority. You appreciate him with your words, affection, time, and your gaze. When he walks through the door, you stop what you’re doing, stand up and greet him: the man you love just walked in.

Do this no matter how busy you are. Do this even if you’ve been married 10 years. It shows respect.

3. You are a joy to come home to after a long day. When your man has had a bad/busy/stressed-out day, you don’t bomb him with your news when he walks in the door. (Please see side note #1 in the margin). One gentleman told me of something his girlfriend (who later became his wife) would do for him when she sensed he’d had a rough day. She would make him a drink, turn on his favorite show, and sit with him. She’d rub his feet for a few minutes. And then she got up and did her thing. This told him, “I’m in your corner. I am your sanctuary. And I’m fine with you de-stressing for 30 minutes without having to give anything.”

When he would talk about it later, she really listened to him. She empathized without advice giving.

They did this trade off for each other. They were tuned in to each others needs and made a habit of being the “shelter person” when the other needed support.

4. You let him contribute to you. Men want to be rock stars for their women. You are able to embody being beautifully empowered and independent, while being receptive and appreciative of what your man wants to give you. You are easy to contribute to.

When in a relationship, we must temper hyper-individualism. Count on him for things. Really count on him…..so much so that if he doesn’t come through for you, it will go undone. And if it does go undone, gently remind him that you are counting on him. 95% of the time, your guy simply missed the communication or forgot.

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People who have loving, lasting relationships set it up so that it is possible for both partners to get what they need from life. And when their partner meets one of their needs they accept it as a gift, instead of viewing each unmet one as a betrayal.

5. You appreciate and accept his financial status. As a conscious woman, you are clear about your financial comfort zone, and you are aware of the economics of your coupling BEFORE you get married.

There has been a major financial reset button since the economy took a dump in 2008. Many people are recovering financially after job loss/layoffs, their investments tanking, losing houses, illness of a family member, divorce, bankruptcy, etc. There has been an increase in multi-generational families living under the same roof together, similar to the era of the Great Depression. There has been a sharp rise in entrepreneurship, which means many people who are in their 30's, 40's, 50's are starting over and living financially leaner. Some people are doing just fine. And some people have great wealth.

Get real with yourself. If a “simple life” to him translates as “destitute and poor” to you, you need to find someone who is on the same economic page as you. Do not go into denial because you are in love and then complain about his job choice and your shared standard of living after you are married.

6. You maintain a reserve. You maintain a certain privacy, no matter how long you have been together. Not a sly withholding or secretiveness, but an aura of dignity. You don’t air every thought and emotion that comes into your head. Your man knows it would take a 100 years to unravel you, and that’s because you have maintained a reserve for yourself. You are committed to your own borders of Self for the rest of your life.

7. You are sexually healthy and available to him. You’re open with yourself and generous to him. You’re lit up by him and welcome his desire. You generate your own sexual appetite. You’ve educated yourself in this regard.

If you have past issues with abuse, the most loving thing you can do for YOURSELF is get it dealt with. It is not acceptable to resign yourself to “I was abused” as a reason to stay unexpressed sexually and shut down your partner’s natural desires. We have been so incredibly fortunate for the past forty (yes, 40) years to have a culture full of therapists, support groups, healing retreats, books, seminars, and kick-ass girlfriends to talk to and get help with. It’s a tremendous disservice to live a low-sex existence because of your abuse, and put that on your husband. It’s your responsibility to make sure that your sexuality is healthy and accessible to the AMAZING man you love. Be delicious for him.

8. You support him in his role as a father. If you love a man who has minor children from a previous marriage, do not behave as if they are in competition with you for his attention. You embrace and support his choice to have a close, nurturing relationship with his children. This means you will, as a couple, be spending time, money, and attention on them.

When men go through divorce, one of the worst fears they deal with is missing out on their kids’ lives. They had a dream when their children were born. Make sure that, on your watch, he gets to live his dream of being an amazing father. Give him the love, freedom, and acceptance to fully engage with his kids.

9. He can trust you 100%. You do not overspend, overeat, become crazy religious, develop emotional relationships with other men, or break his confidence with your mom, sister, or girlfriends. You are faithful. Yes, all of these are areas of faithfulness.

10 tips on how to treat fever blisters naturally at home

Fever blisters appear around the oral cavity and the lips, even in the genital areas. Their symptoms are burning, severe itching, and intense pain that result in the skin sore or raw. This writing listed the best ways on how to treat fever blisters. If you are suffering these symptoms, you can keep reading the article to learn more.
Top 10 Effective Ways To Treat Fever Blisters At Home

1. Avoid Spreading 

The Infection You should be sure that your skin is clean when your blister breaks and erupts because it will help in stopping further infection.
• You have to avoid touching and scratching your blister because it will spread the infection to your body parts. You must be sure that the infection doesn’t spread to other people. • You don’t touch other people. In addition, you should avoid kissing and other activities, which can spread the virus to the others through physical contact.
• You rinse the hands clearly after you touch your blister.
• You have to clean your affected area every day with cotton. Other people should not be used utensils like glass that are used by the infected one.

2. Lemon Balm 

You should use lemon balm on your blisters because it contains antiviral properties.
• Crush some lemon balm leaves.
• Take 2 to 4 teaspoons of leaves and put it into boiling water for about fifteen minutes.
• Cool and use this way on the blister by using the cotton.
• Repeat this way on your blister many times per day.
You can also take the lemon balm plant from a nursery. They will reduce the symptoms of blisters and heals the blisters. Lemon balm contains ingredients like eugenol and tannin, which help in numbing the affected area and killing bacteria.

3. Table Salt 

Salt contains anti-inflammatory properties, which helps reduce swelling as well as redness caused by the blister.
• Wet your fingers with water and massage table salt on your blister.
• Press the fingers on your blister for 3-5 minutes.
• You can also soak cotton in hot water, and then add some salt to it and rub it on the blister.
• First sight, you will have burning feeling, but it can cure the problem.
• Repeat this way twice daily for three days.

4. Foods To Avoid

The following foods are certain should be avoided to prevent the fever blisters from becoming worse.
• It is salt because it increases swelling and causes water retention.
• Foods have a high amount of arginine substance should be avoided because they can make the blister outbreak in future. Crab, lobsters, sesame seeds, turkey, peanut flour and spinach are the foods which contain high in an arginine substance.
• You should avoid highly acidic foods because the herpes simplex virus will thrive in an acidic environment. Therefore, you should reduce tomatoes and citrus fruits completely when you are in fever blisters.
• You should avoid soft drinks, chocolates, coffee, beans, legumes and seeds completely.

5. Do Not Use Your Toothbrush

You should throw out your toothbrush when the blister has formed. You have to toss it one time the blister has cleared up. In fact, a toothbrush is a convenient vessel to develop the virus. You can continue triggering an outbreak if you use the same toothbrush. This is a preventative way to cut it short or stop an outbreak, it is well worth doing.

6. Add Vitamins C And E

Vitamins are very good for you as well as your fever blisters. Vitamin C can increase white blood cell count that is the body’s defenders. Vitamin E, when applied to your blisters, reduces the painful and irritating discomfort of fever blisters, as well as minimizes scarring. You can take the vitamin C and E through an oral supplement.
There are many ways on how to treat fever blisters, keep reading this article to get more information!
Vitamin C rich foods are:
• spinach
• red and green bell peppers
• red berries
• kiwi
• tomatoes
• broccoli
Vitamin E rich foods are:
• Nuts
• whole grain
• leafy green vegetables
• avocados

7. Apple Cider Vinegar

An effective way on how to treat fever blisters is apple cider vinegar. You must use the vinegar on your blisters. You can also add water into the vinegar and drink it. It helps in removing the toxins from the body and eliminating the virus reliable for fever blisters.
You dip a cotton swab in apple cider vinegar and clean all the blisters for four or five times per day. The itching and pain too will subside; the fever blisters will be treated swiftly.

8. Coconut Oil

Coconut oil, which is simple way on how to treat fever blisters, contains marvelous antibacterial, antiviral, anti-inflammatory and antifungal properties. It has a huge source of nutrients that treat the damaged skin as well as provide huge relief in the itching and pain.
You apply coconut oil to your blisters every few hours. It will quickly start the healing process by killing the virus. Coconut oil will also restore the damaged tissue and cells.

9. Honey

Honey helps in treating fever blisters. It contains antiviral and antibiotic properties. Honey helps in annihilating virus that causes the fever blisters.
You apply honey on your blisters. Honey has sugar that helps in stopping the accumulation of fungus and bacteria. Using honey will heal your blisters quickly. Honey has flavonoids and phenolic acid, which helps annihilate the herpes virus causing the fever blisters. You should not use this remedy if you are pollen allergy. Infants are also not suitable for getting rid of fever blister.

10. Eat Lysine Rich Foods

Being an amino acid, lysine has been shown to be effective in preventing the development of the herpes simplex virus. Therefore, you should eat an abundance of lysine foods including cheese, chicken, fish, eggs, lima beans, potatoes, soy and brewer’s yeast.
You should increase their intake if you have one outbreak of fever blisters. When you are on the process to recovery, you can reduce the amount but continue with it.

15 Things Men like in Women More than good look

The things men like in women often have nothing to do with looks, bra size or any of the standard things we think men fall for. In fact, although physical appearance is the first thing they notice (don’t we all?), when it comes to settling down, looks often come in last and count the least. Believe it or not, there are at least 15 completely non-physical things men like in women and I’m pretty sure your boyfriend could list many more and confirm that your gorgeous physique, beautiful #eyes and soft lips are not the only things that made him fall head over heels for you! Interested to learn more about those other things #men like in women? Well, #read carefully because every man would love to be with a woman who is…

1. A Good Listener

Most men appreciate #women who are able to just listen – no “ I told you so” lines, no lectures, tips or comments regarding what you would do if you were in his place. You know… just sitting, listening (and I mean REALLY listening)… just showing that you care. Oh, and that involves being patient as well, understanding that most men need to “process” their problems before they can talk about them and learning to say, “Okay, #baby, whenever you want to talk about it – I’m here for you.” The ability to listen and really hear what's being said is one of the #things men like in women because it's so supportive -- and they're much more likely to reciprocate.

2. Spontaneous

Being able to “go with the flow” is one of the traits men like in #women the most, and I must admit I’m still not nearly as spontaneous as my fiance would like me to be, although I’m working on it. Most of our men would never sing in front of us (professional singers excluded) but they just love to hear us sing (even if it sounds more like howling), they love to see us dance around the house, they will gladly throw us a surprise if they know the reaction will be positive and they love to see us being us (even if it involves a certain dose of silliness).

3. A Good Driver

Although our men often complain about #female drivers, most of them would agree driving skills are a must for a modern woman. But, some of them are ready to go even further and admit they LOVE a woman who can make that engine purr like an overgrown kitten! Shocking? Nah, not really!

4. Accomplished and Fulfilled

Women who actually enjoy the things they do are more attractive, which means you should definitely stop whining about the things you DON’T have and start enjoying the #things you DO! It’s not about being extremely #beautiful, having a good job, an impressive resume or whatnot – it’s about you being happy about who you are as a person, it’s about being positive, about knowing that you’re a great woman who deserves great things. And, believe me, it’s true that bad luck never travels alone, but the same can be said for good luck as well.

5. Able to Enjoy Her Food

Eating healthy food and trying to cut down on unnecessary #calories is one thing; obsessively counting them is something completely different. While this first thing is actually good for you, the second one won’t really impress him. Being able to go out to a restaurant or a pizza place, to relax, to have a good #time and talk about your food in terms of how good it tastes instead of how fat it’s going to make you shows that you’re confident… and we already know confidence is one of the things men (real men) like in women – don’t we?

6. A Good Cook

Our grandmas used to say that the only way to get to a man’s heart is through his #stomach – remember that one? Well, we have learned by now that’s not the only way, although it certainly is one of the ways and, if I may add, a very good one. Men love women who can cook and women who would be willing to learn to cook for them. That’s when that traditional part of the brain turns on to note the #woman in question would be a good wife. It’s a cliche, I know, but even experts agree on this one!

7. Real

Although fake girls with their fake this, that and #everything turn a lot of heads and probably get a lot of free drinks, most men have agreed they could never choose a girl like that for something more than just a casual romance. Whoa! What a coincidence – we feel the same way about fake guys! Which leads us back to that ideal, fun loving, girl next door all guys love – a girl who likes to smile and doesn’t care what others think of her smile (thin lips, teeth or whatever), a girl who can tell a joke, a girl who doesn’t use “words” like OMG or TTYL, a girl who won’t have a nervous breakdown every time her #mascara starts running… a REAL girl!

8. Ready to Compromise

Every #man feels better when he knows his lady is ready to negotiate and work hard to find a solution that will be acceptable for both sides. So, I hope you’re ready to compromise, girls, because although guys like boobs and long #legs, they all agree this non-physical quality is far more important. It makes for a much longer, happier, more fulfilling #relationship as well.

9. Caring

He really wants to know that you care for him but be careful, because repeating “I love you” until he can’t take it anymore isn’t a good way to let him know how you feel. An average #man will tell you that he loves you once and show you how much he loves you five times. You should do the same. Baby him when he’s sick or tired, surprise him every once in a while, listen to his problems – SHOW him #everything you want to tell him because this quality is one of the very important things men like in women.

10. Funny

A sense of humor is also one of the #things men like in women, especially in women they are planning to settle down with! #Time to find your funny bone, ladies! Now, I wonder why is that so… are they planning to make a lot of jokes or do they just want to make sure we’re able to find positive or maybe even funny sides in the future events that aren’t guaranteed to be stress free and easy? I don’t know but a sense of humor definitely gets my vote!

11. Taking Care of Herself

Can you believe this is one of the #things guys like in women? I mean, come on, can it be? They actually LIKE when we spend #money on all those creams and beauty products? Well, hold onto your chairs now, ladies, because the experts say the answer is “yes.” Taking care of yourself shows him you’ll take good care of him as well, and since they are the ones who enjoy all the #benefits of our waxing, beauty treatments and shopping, they might as well admit they like it.

12. Strong

One of the best things men like in #women, a quality like no other, a virtue that no woman of today could live without – strength. You don’t have to lose your best damsel in distress act, in fact, you can even let him “save” you once in a while, but he has to know you’ll be there if #things start to get ugly. He has to know that there is a strong rock he can grab for under that delicate butterfly facade of yours – a #woman he can count on.

13. Natural when It Counts

Just because we like makeup doesn’t mean that we have to wear it all of the #time. A #guy wants a girl that is going to be natural when it counts -- such as going to the beach! A guy loves it when a girl doesn’t take two hours to #look perfect when, in his opinion, she is perfect no matter what. He wants a #girl that is so confident in herself, she doesn’t need anything but herself.

14. Isn’t Scared to Get down & Dirty

Of course, getting down and dirty is going to be a huge plus to a #guy. He wants someone that isn’t going to freak out about a bug or getting their nails dirty. He wants someone that would be down with doing ‘boy’ #things and can be tomboyish just sometimes!

15. Motherly Instinct

Ah, the motherly instinct is a definite must for most guys. He wants someone that will take care of him … and in turn, he will take care of you. Guys also want to know that whomever they choose to have a family with, their kids will be taken care of in the best possible way.
You see, the things men like in women are almost the same as the things #women like in men. Interesting, huh? Certainly! Do you know of any other #things men like in women? Feel free to ask your #man, too!